How to Tell Someone You’re Only Interested in Sex Without Sounding Like an Asshole

The title here is optimistic. If you say to someone who feels for you the feeling you do not want to meet with him, but still want to sleep with him, you’re probably going to look like an asshole. But we have some tips on how to sound less similar. You are not really a bad person, but when it comes to feelings, it is easy for people to get offended, so proceed with caution by following the tips below.

Make sure this is really what you want

Before you go to another person with a statement, you are not interested in their personality, but there is a lot of interest in their body, make sure you know what you really want.

Are you doing this because you are afraid of the relationship or are you still suffering from previous relationships? Are you trying to meet several people at the same time and wondering how to explain it ?

The key is to explore your own feelings before you influence someone else’s feelings. If the problem isn’t that you don’t want to stay in a relationship but feel that you can’t – for some reason – you can handle it with the other person.

But if you really want something everyday and physical, that’s okay too. Read more.

Start with a compliment

The easiest way to strike up a difficult conversation is to always start in a positive way. It’s true when you quit your job (“I’ve really learned a lot in the last three years, but …”) or tell the stylist that you don’t like your hair color (“I like the way my bangs turned out, but …”). it is also true when you try to easily fail someone while at the same time seducing him to sleep with you casually.

If you say bluntly that you don’t want to date someone, you start off with some belittling, even if you don’t intend to. Start well. After all, there are good traits in the other person. Try it:

“I really enjoyed getting to know you better over the past few weeks. You’re super funny and cute, but I can’t get into a relationship right now. Although the sex is great – and I hope you feel the same way – so if you’re interested, I would like it to continue. “

Samantha N., a 29-year-old New Yorker who has had similar conversations on several occasions, added: “If you’re worried that just wanting to have sex will hurt another person, I think the best way is to put it on. myself.”

In other words, take responsibility for your disinterest in the relationship. Make it clear that you just aren’t interested in dating right now. Samantha added: “Obviously, the most important thing is to respect any feedback someone has. If someone can’t do it, that’s okay. Move on to the next person. Not that you were emotionally invested in them. “

Remember that the other person may refuse such an arrangement. This is their right, and you are at risk.

Be as honest as possible

You don’t want to hurt another person for two reasons: First, of course, you are a decent person who doesn’t like seeing others in pain. Second, you still want them to sleep with you after you turned them down in a romantic relationship.

That being said, you still need to be honest. Use your judgment to walk the fine line between being honest and offensive .

If your desire to be only physical is despicable, for example, if your parents disapprove of the other person, do not tell them everything. But if they ask direct questions, you have to give them an explanation, especially if you have multiple dates and really like you.

Don’t be hard on yourself

There is nothing wrong with knowing what you want, talking openly about it, and realizing that you want something physical, not emotional.

As Samantha said, “This is 2021, so fortunately for everyone, it is perfectly normal, respectful and beneficial to communicate your needs to others.”

Even if this conversation is uncomfortable, it’s better to be frank about what you want than to continue leading someone.