I Am the Cartoonist Lucy Knisley and This Is How I Am a Parent
Lucy Knisley has made a career out of sketching her life. Her latest graphic novel, Baby Gloves, details her difficult transition to motherhood, from fertility issues to miscarriages and near-death experiences during childbirth. It is an intimate and highly informative document illustrating the science and history of reproductive health. (I found out that women wore corsets during pregnancy until the 1910s, and doctors finally began to realize that this was not such a good idea.) Knisley also just released an illustrated book called You Are New , in which the joy of being a baby is glorified. She lives with her partner John, her child, whom she calls “Palindrome,” and a cat named Linney. That’s how her parents are.
Name: Lucy Knisley Location: Chicago Job: Cartoonist Family: Husband John, my two-year-old son “Pal” (that’s the codename) and my evil old cat, Linnie.
Tell us a little about your family and your career. Was life mostly according to plan or were there any surprises?
I grew up with a dad professor of literature and mom a chef / artist, so while I was lucky enough to envision the future of a writer or artist, I didn’t combine the two until I was in college and suddenly realized that the comics I was doing on my album, were what I wanted to do all this time. It was a surprise, as was the idea that I could really make a career. I was very lucky and happy in the work that I had to do.
Tell us about your morning routine. What are your best tricks to get out the door?
Well, I work from home, so it’s not so much to walk out the door as to get everyone out the door so I can get to work. We get up around six with our baby (his choice, not ours), and I usually put him in the pot and dress him while my partner makes coffee and prepares breakfast. We usually eat yogurt, muesli and fruit, and then we start dancing, trying to get the toddler to put on his boots and coat. He goes to kindergarten three days a week, then we have a nanny here for one day, and on the last weekday he is with me. So it depends on the day, but usually everyone gets to where they need to be by 9am. I also sit at my desk by 9 and try to stay there and not get too distracted until about 3:30 when I go to pick up. preschooler.
How much outside help do you get as a parent? Who or what cannot you live without?
We are fortunate enough to have a wonderful nanny, Angelica, for whom we have worked part-time since our son was 14 weeks old. It was great because I could trust her to take care of him in the house while I was working and I could breastfeed him when he was a hungry baby. She’s also an artist, so we have some things in common and we can talk about work. It helps me focus, knowing that she’s at home and I can’t just mess around even when I’m tired because I’m paying her to work! Now that Pal goes to kindergarten three days a week, Angelica only comes in once a week, but she stays in the evenings so my partner and I can arrange a date. This is just wonderful and I love her. We also have my partner’s parents who come every two weeks for the afternoon, and they are always great to do the laundry or take the little dude on an adventure while I check some of the things on the list.
Have you come across a life-changing parenting product?
I think every parent goes through some serious trials when their child is newborn. I will add that I had undiagnosed preeclampsia and nearly died in childbirth. We were all hanging by a thread. That’s when they catch you! I would like to pay any amount of money for any item that promised to make parenting easier. I bought these BabyBackups that helped prevent explosions . We had Ruffle and Merlin ‘s Magic Sleeping Suit (the latter seemed to be the most useful in those days). Now that he’s gotten older, we don’t rely so much on gadgets, but I really like our Micro Trike , which looks like this foldable scooter. He grows small enough to fit upstairs and allows him to feel like he is riding a bike and not in a stroller, which he never liked. We travel a lot on it, and parents always turn to it.
Has the way you work changed the way you become a parent?
Yes, it’s amazing how productive you get when you pay for the right to work.
What’s your best parenting technique?
I am immensely proud of this: his didgeridoo. They brought us a poster when he was still a baby, and the packaging tube fascinated him. At the end we blow and release the didgeridoo, so it became his didgeridoo! From the very beginning, I made it clear that all stickers go to didgeridoo. Here comes the stickers! New sticker from the doctor’s office? Didgeridoo. Happy birthday stickers pack? They would look great on a didgeridoo. This saved us from being buried under the stickers that were pasted to every piece of furniture and walls in our house, and I highly recommend getting your own didgeridoo with extensive decals.
Why did you decide to create a graphic novel about pregnancy?
I have always been fascinated by reproductive health. In fact, from an early age I wanted to be a midwife. Now I’m a cartoonist, but creating this book is a kind of fulfillment of a childhood dream. I didn’t expect my own pregnancy to be fraught with troubles and medical dramas (as it was), but I knew it would be a wild ride and a transitional state, like everyone who goes through it, and that this aspect is consistent with my work. and my documentation on these transients. You are also constantly learning as a parent-to-be, and many of the things I learned were information never taught in my sex classes. I needed an honest book full of fact and truth, written by someone who had gone through it, and many of the books I found were highly clinical or written by a male doctor. So this is the book I wanted when I was a kid who wanted to learn more about reproductive biology and as a hopeful parent who wanted to know that I was not alone.
Any pregnancy tips you can share?
Do not buy shoes if you are pregnant or planning to become pregnant. I had to throw out all my shoes when I grew one size after pregnancy. I’m still mad about that.
Is there something that your parents did that you would like to pass on to your child?
I was afraid of having a picky child. I ate well, and my parents never fed me anything other than what they ate, so I learned to love food from an early age, which became the subject of my book Taste . But my husband had a constant chicken finger diet for many years (not so much because of his parents, but because of his stubbornness), so I was worried that our child would follow him. So far, Pal is a great eater and his favorite food is salmon, so I’m glad I was able to continue the way my parents instilled in me a love of (good) food.
How do you unpack?
I doze when I can get them. I used to be a champion in sleep, but my child hates sleep, so my sleep time has dropped dramatically. Now, if I get the chance to take a nap, it’s like I won a free spa day.
What are you most proud of as a parent?
Nowadays, it is whenever he poops in a pot. But I was also amazed when he did something kind and sweet without prompting. There was a new child in his class and he came home to tell him where the class was, and I thought I would faint with pride.
What moment are you least proud of?
Whenever I lose my temper. This potty training is so difficult that you don’t want to permanently scar it and create strange associations with the toilet! But for the fourth time in one day, your character is hanging by a thread. Yesterday I said, “Oh!” and just sped away, so it was a pretty low point.
What do you want your child to learn from your example?
I hope he learns compassion and kindness. I’ve always been proud of it, and my partner was proud of it too. I want him to count others; land, strangers, friends, family, animals.
What are your favorite funny / weird / special family rituals?
After going for a swim at night, I like to swaddle him in a towel and carry him around for a while, talking about my newborn baby. This is infinitely funny for him and for me, since he already easily reaches forty-five pounds, and hardly fits in a towel. I think this is the way we would like to revive our birth experience as his birth was traumatic and fraught with medical drama, so getting him out of the bathtub and hugging him like a newborn baby is healing for both of us. My partner always rolls his eyes, but he understands. Hopefully Pal will let me do this until he turns 18.
Has anyone ever given you parenting advice that you really liked?
Whenever we have a tough time – not getting enough sleep, potty training, the beginning of preschool education and the endless parade of illnesses that accompanies it – my father-in-law loves to say, “Now you’re in the thick of things!” I’ve always appreciated this sympathetic sign that this won’t last forever. It’s such a kind and thoughtful way to let us take a step back and see where we are and see the past and future where things were different – maybe not easier, but different.
What’s the hardest part about being a parent?
My partner and I love to talk about the fact that adulthood (work, friends, health, family) is a plate full, and adding parental rights is a second plate full. It’s a lot! But it’s good that we are hungry!
What’s your favorite part of the day?
Every parent’s favorite part: the plump time. Before going to bed just around the corner, one-on-one parties, some charming butts.
The only thing I would like to say to other parents who are pursuing a career:
Tell us about the help you get! Appreciate it out loud because many other parents struggle and believe that everyone else is doing it unaided. It is unhealthy to expect people to do everything on their own. I am always so happy to hear about the help people receive – it does not detract from your achievements as a parent or professional, it lifts the spirits of all working parents, relieving us of the burden of waiting for us to have 48 hours a day. day!
Anything else you want to share?
Before becoming a parent, I worried that I would lose motivation to pursue art due to fatigue or distraction from my parents. The opposite is true for me. My child is so funny, and drawing on the subject of parenthood was my salvation – it made other parents feel less lonely and me less lonely. So if you are worried that having a child might undermine your artistic ambitions, please don’t!