When to Talk About Personal Problems at Work
If in your personal life you are going through a period of stress, is it worth bringing it up at work? When should you tell your manager about a personal problem that might affect your work? Are there situations where it might be a bad idea to share details of your personal life at work?
As with most workplace issues, it depends on the context and of course your current relationship with your boss and / or coworkers.
At Muse , decision-making coach Nell Wolfhart suggests asking yourself five questions before talking about personal issues to your boss, including “Does this issue affect my work” and “Is there anything my boss can do to help?” If you are dealing with a personal stressor but still meet deadlines and expectations in the workplace, for example, telling your manager about what’s going on in your personal life may seem overwhelming.
However, if you want to ask for a little more time to complete a certain outcome – or just explain to your boss why you haven’t been so focused lately – it might be appropriate to talk. As Wulfhart explains:
A good manager wants to know what worries you when it affects your work. If they don’t know why, they may think that you are relaxing, losing interest in your work, or doing something wrong. Knowing that something else is happening can help them change the way they manage their team.
So if this issue directly or indirectly affects your day-to-day work at work, please report it! Even just telling your boss that you know your work is not up to par is good news: it shows that you are paying attention and taking responsibility. And if you have a plan to fix it, even better!
Wolfhart also suggests asking yourself if you are willing to spend some of your working capital on a specific conversation or request. If you are not familiar with the idea of capital in the workplace , it essentially means “the goodwill that you have accumulated in your work so far.” For example, if you are a new employee and have not yet established yourself as a hardworking team member, you may not have the capital to fulfill a specific request. (Think of it as asking for a PTO that you haven’t accumulated yet.) If you’ve worked for a company for a while and have a history of high productivity, you most likely have capital in the workplace. spendable, which means you can ask for a little extra time to complete a project or the ability to work from home for the rest of the week.
You should also ask yourself if it makes sense to share this information with your company culture. Some workplaces encourage their employees to be open about their personal lives; others share work and personal matters.
Finally, it’s worth asking yourself if you can get what you need without revealing too many personal details. Can you call a sick person and take a mental health day, for example? If you need time to deal with a problem at home (or recover from it), sometimes you can take advantage of this time without offering any explanation.
You may also have workplace benefits that are designed to provide support during difficult personal experiences, from bereavement leave to FMLA to EAP. Rest assured, access your benefits when you need them – after all, the HR team has likely held multiple meetings to discuss how to motivate employees to use these benefits and resources! Depending on your workplace, you can access everything from counseling to meditation lessons.
If you faced a personal problem that affected your ability to get the job done, how did you deal with it? Have you spoken to your supervisor? Have you been out of work for a few days? Did you enjoy specific benefits? If you haven’t told anyone about your personal problem at work, how did you overcome it, and what advice can you share?