The Pie Dough Does Not Need to Be Cracked
For reasons I will never fully understand, the only part of the pie making process that anyone tries to crack is by far the easiest. Kneading the dough is as easy as shelling pears; all you do is simply bundle cold fat and flour together with a little water. This is not a process to be hacked.
But making a pie is not easy. But no one brings the same magical, scientific hacker energy into the truly annoying parts. Roll the dough into a perfect circle and wait – while the freezer does its job, the cake is baked and then completely cooled – these are the basic principles of making a cake, and you cannot speed them up. Once your dough hits the counter, your fate is in the hands of God and the laws of thermodynamics. Maybe that’s why there are so many tips and tricks for kneading the dough itself; we all crave a sense of control, even if it’s just an illusion.
I’m not saying your favorite pie recipe is wrong if it’s based on any of these tricks. Pie is 90% experience and 10% luck, and if you already know what works, you are ready for life. This one is for newbies, ambitious pie geniuses who sift through millions of Google results for crust recipes once or twice a year before giving up and buying frozen ones instead. (I’m saying this without judgment, by the way; frozen crusts are a real life hack.) You don’t need a food processor, vodka, or even a grater to make a great pie crust – in fact, these things can end up making your life harder than it does. must be.
Pastry blenders sucks
Pastry blenders – sometimes referred to as pastry cutters – are the highlight of the OG Pie and I hate them. I have used it for years because I thought it was right, but it never saved me or made my life easier in any noticeable way. The blades always seemed to bend around the butter cubes rather than cutting into them, which meant I was finishing the job with my hands. With that said, I’m a sane person capable of self-reflection, and so I’ll admit that this probably has more impact on the tools I choose than all pastry blenders. If you love yours, ignore me, but if you’re considering buying, I just don’t think they are necessary.
Grated butter – more hassle than it’s worth
A nifty trick that has been gaining popularity in the past few years is to grate frozen butter sticks rather than rubbing it into flour with your fingers. I see two problems with this. First, it takes time to grate on the piece of butter, and you will have enough time to melt or soften the end you are holding. Second, the shredded pieces of butter melt much faster than the larger, fatty chunks, so you’ll have to be more valuable with the finished dough to avoid smudging it all over the place. I’m just not sure what you get with this.
Vodka for drinking, not for pie
Vodka crust should be the most popular technique and the presentation is convincing. Since gluten molecules only bond in the presence of water, the theory is that replacing some of the water with vodka creates a plastic dough with minimal gluten formation. Then, when the pie is in the oven, the vodka evaporates completely, leaving a deliciously crispy crust behind. Good.
That’s the problem. As with any butter dough, the absolute risk of too much gluten forming is negligible, especially if you knead the dough by hand. Much more common is the occasional flaw in the test due to the fear of overworking it – and I would say that it is even worse. Confectionery needs a little gluten development because that’s where they get their structure. An underdeveloped crust can be flaky, but good luck keeping it together. Stick to the water for the crust and save the vodka for a martini or fancy infusion where you really appreciate it.
Put away the food processor
A lot of people enjoy making pie dough in a food processor: you just load the ingredients, pulsate, and go. It’s not that it’s not working, but that it’s nowhere near as effective as intended. The most time-consuming steps in making pie dough are cooling and rolling out the dough. Kneading and kneading should take about one minute. Taking out the food processor and mixing the dough won’t save you a lot of time and effort.
Then there is another food processor hack: bloom the absolute giblets from your butter with some of the flour to create a paste , and then incorporate the pasta into the dough in large chunks. This is supposed to create a super flexible dough that is still crumbly and tender, and it may well, but I am not being sold. Food processors are incredibly powerful and heat up very quickly; Depending on your particular machine and batch size, it seems all too easy to accidentally melt this butter paste. Also, you have to scrape it into a bowl and add it with the rest of the ingredients, which sounds like side dishes to me.
There is a secret – and it’s very simple
I speak from my own experience when I say that there is exactly one secret to the perfect pie crust: rely on the kneading step, rather than the initial stirring, to mix the fat. Instead of spending a couple of minutes painstakingly cutting butter into flour with your fingertips, toss the cold butter cubes into the dry ingredients and rub them gently. Mix with water, pour all the loose, shaggy mass on the table and brush the dough several times with your palm until it grabs, like this:
The French call this technique scuffing , but I call it common sense: cold fat makes puff pastry, and hands are the warmest dough touches. The less time you spend touching those hot little fingers on bare butter (or lard or greasy butter), the less likely it is to melt. Once it’s completely floured, you don’t need to be so careful – hence the wear .
That’s really all you need to do. The pie-making process is full of opportunities to speculate and doubt too much; don’t overcomplicate the simplest part. You have something to worry about.