A Disconnected Adult’s Guide to Kids Culture: Generation Alpha Is Killing the Fart Joke
Time isn’t really a flat circle; it’s a downward spiral, and each turn takes you further away from understanding what 16-year-olds are talking about.
“What the hell is this ‘doorking’ thing?” I hear you ask. “Is ‘polyphonic perception’ a disease?” you continue. “And why don’t kids laugh at farts anymore!? “ you ask plaintively, a tear rolling down your cheek.
It’s a good thing I’m here because I have the answers to these questions and many more you haven’t even thought to ask. So get ready to use all your contextual-semantic fluency to understand the secret world around you.
Does Gen Alpha normalize farts?
We may have to face the disturbing possibility that Generation Alpha is emotionally stable and fart jokes are a thing of the past.
Remember when you were in elementary school and someone farted and everyone laughed? Apparently that’s not the case anymore. There are several videos on TikTok where little kids are asked about farts and they say very reasonable things like “it’s normal” and “it’s like laughing at hiccups.” The Gen A kids in these videos also say that no one gets teased at school for farts anymore, even if they’re really smelly. What kind of world are we living in ?
Check them out:
“A couple of TikTok videos” is the definition of “sparse, anecdotal evidence,” but it feels right, and there’s something compelling about the kids’ responses, even if they’re inconclusive. These kids don’t seem like they’re trying to be accepting or adult; they’re genuinely puzzled by the question, as if they can’t understand why anyone would find farts funny.
I don’t know what to make of that. It’s natural, but then again, where’s the weirdness in that? What about the joy of being accused of farting and being able to say, “Sniffer, that’s one thing”? What about that defining rite of passage of farting in front of others and just admitting it? Kids won’t understand Blazing Saddles at all, and they won’t understand what Rodney Dangerfield meant when he said, “Did somebody step on a duck?” in The Putt-Putt Club . Brave new world, indeed.
What is doorking, pwerking and bwerking?
Whether it’s WAP , Wednesday , or The Box , TikTok has always been known for its dancing, and right now, three new dance moves are gaining popularity on the platform: dwerking, pwerking, and bwerking. These terms are all variations of the word “twerking.” Dwerking is the male version of twerking, which can be roughly defined as “a sexually suggestive dance characterized by rapid, repetitive hip thrusts and shaking (SLANG FOR THE MALE GENITALS).” The “P” in pwerking stands for P-shaking, and the B in bwerking stands for chest. Here are videos illustrating each:
The moves are certainly not new. People have been freak dancing for ages, so this is another example of young people giving an old style a new name and thinking they invented it. I wrote about this in more detail in this article .
(For more slang definitions, check out my ever-expanding Gen Z and Alpha Slang Glossary. )
What is “polyphonic perception”?
Speaking of kids who think they invented everything, TikToker Brell has shared her thoughts on music theory. In a recent video titled “Visualizing Polyphonic Perception,” she breaks down how she hears Justin Timberlake’s “My Love,” noting her ability to “hear every part of it and respond to it differently” and boasting that she “even hears the little ‘ah …
Brell’s commenters were quick to mock her, leaving posts like, “I would kill for this combination of delusion and protagonist energy,” and “I have polyvision. I can see out of both eyes. It’s a true gift. Please respect my journey.”
The jokes are funny, but I think she’s right (in a way). Calling it “polyphonic perception” is ridiculous (most people perceive polyphony), but some people really do hear music better than others. Some people easily recognize intervals or have perfect pitch. Moreover, this recognition is not new.
During the heyday of jazz in the 1950s, hepcats would compliment people by saying things like, “This guy’s got ears , man,” meaning something like, “This guy has a very developed sense of musicality.” Sometimes this referred to a musician who could play easily by ear, but sometimes it meant more like, “This person has the ability to appreciate and understand music better than anyone else.” The idea of “having ears” (or “polyphonic perception,” if you prefer) is also closely related to taste. The ability to discern complex musical compositions implies the ability to appreciate and understand the difference between “good” and “bad” music. Some might argue that musical taste is subjective, but then again, many people prefer to listen to Kid Rock over Stevie Wonder, so they must have worse hearing, right?
What is Meltmaxing?
Gen Z actually invented“meltmaxxing.” The name comes from “ looksmaxxing ,” but it’s not some creepy bone-crunching thing from the sleazy corners of the internet where anything plus “maxxing” is considered normal. It’s actually a wholesome meme where you film yourself “melting,” going from 0% to 50%, and so on up to 100% and beyond. The melting isn’t achieved with an Instagram filter, but by relaxing your face into a double chin, keeping your mouth slightly open, and seriously slouching. You “ squeeze your face in until you have six chins ,” Aryan and Remy explain. You might even drool.
Here are some videos to give you an idea:
Viral Video of the Week: Blackpink – “뛰어(JUMP)” MV
The collective polyphonic perception and polyvision of the world’s youth have determined that K-pop group Blackpink’s music video for “Jump” is amazing, and who am I to argue? Posted about two weeks ago, the video has already racked up over 100 million views. Blackpink, if you weren’t aware, is one of the most influential and popular groups of the Korean Wave. Unlike other K-pop acts, they have some serious staying power: Blackpink has been around for almost a decade and is still churning out hits. As for the song itself, I’m obviously not in the target audience, but you don’t need a sophisticated polyphonic perception to understand what’s working here: powerful hooks and production so clean it sounds like music from outer space.