The Most Effective Ways to Combat Psychological Avoidance

According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), more than 40 million adults in the United States (19.1%) suffered from an anxiety disorder in the past year, making it the most common mental disorder in the country. And this figure only counts those who sought help and received a formal diagnosis from a doctor, not the millions of others who deal with everyday anxiety.

But according to Luana Marquez , PhD, assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, it’s not our anxiety that holds us back, it’s how we respond to it. According to her, many people react to this type of stress with psychological avoidance . Here’s what you need to know about psychological avoidance and how to deal with it.

What is psychological avoidance?

Psychological avoidance means that people react to a perceived threat in a way that makes them feel better in the moment, but ultimately has negative consequences.

According to Marquez, who coined the term , three common signs of psychological avoidance are retreating, reacting, and maintaining.

How to deal with psychological avoidance

In an article for CNBC Make It , Marquez offers the following strategies for combating the most common forms of psychological avoidance:

Retreat

When it comes to dealing with anxiety, we tend to think in terms of fight, flight, or freeze, but Marquez says retreat is a more subtle version of flight. This might include things like having a glass of wine (or several) to temporarily take your mind off the stresses of everyday life, or calling in sick to avoid giving a presentation at work.

Instead of retreating, Marquez recommends identifying one of the thoughts or fears that is causing your anxiety and asking yourself, “What data do I have to support this?” or “What would my best friend say in this situation?” “The empirical evidence you gain can help you overcome this harmful thinking,” she says.

Reaction

This includes reacting to anxiety with immediate, knee-jerk reactions, such as storming out in a meeting if you feel attacked and want to immediately defend yourself. Marquez suggests taking a step back—and taking a breath (or several)—before reacting to a situation. “The first step is to pause and then approach your discomfort rather than trying to eliminate it,” she says.

Remaining

This is the equivalent of the “freeze” anxiety response. “This is the tendency to stay stagnant in uncomfortable situations, such as an unhealthy relationship or a job that is mentally and physically draining,” explains Marquez.

But instead of trying to convince yourself that everything is fine and normal and will get better over time, she says it’s better to “identify what’s really important to you and take one small step every day to move in that direction.”