Learn the Discreet Hand Signal That Can Save Lives
A signal for help is a simple gesture – show your hand, palm outward, then close your fingers on your thumb – but it can save your life.
Just last week, a 16-year-old girl who went missing in North Carolina was rescued in Kentucky after she signaled to a passing motorist. According to the Laurel County Sheriff’s Office , the unnamed teenager “made gestures that TikTok knows to represent domestic violence – I need help.”
Another motorist recognized the sign and called the police, then followed the car for several miles, relaying the information to the authorities. After the traffic was stopped, police in Kentucky arrested 61-year-old James Brick and charged him with a first-degree illegal jail sentence and a second charge of possession of material demonstrating the sexual activity of a minor for materials found on his phone. The girl was reunited with her family.
The hand signal was created by the Canadian Women’s Foundation at the start of the pandemic, and awareness of it has spread to TikTok and other social media platforms. The intent was to give victims of domestic violence the ability to silently signal distress during a video call so that no digital evidence is left to the abusers. Here is avideo re-enactment of the signal in action .
What to do if someone gives you a distress signal
If a random passenger shows you a sign on the highway, you should probably call the police, but things get a little more complicated if you get a sign from a friend or acquaintance.
According to the Canadian Shelter for Women, the sign does not mean “call authorities immediately.” It means “reach me safely.” If someone you know flashes a help signal during a video call, Canadian Women’s Shelter invites you to “talk safely with that person to find out what they need and want to do.” The idea is to let the person sending the signal take the lead instead of assuming you know what they want or need.
The Canadian Women’s Shelter also suggests responding to the sign by asking questions that can be answered yes or no if someone is listening to the other half of the conversation. So ask, “Do you want me to call 911?” or “Should I look for services that can help you and call you back?” instead of “Tell me what’s going on.”
They also suggest contacting the person through another form of communication and asking seemingly innocent questions like “How are you?” or “Contact me when you can.”
What if the abuser also knows the signal?
Coercive signals like these can be a double-edged sword. They rely on what many people know about them to do their jobs, but this means that offenders are more likely to find out about them. The creators of Alert Signal emphasize that Alert is just one tool that can be used from time to time to indicate to people that they need help. This is not a miracle.
It’s still worth knowing. A simple, recognizable hand gesture can be used much more discreetly during a video call than a spoken phrase, and unlike an email or text, there will be no traces left from it to be discovered when the call is over.