Please Stop Using These Common Age Related Phrases.
Ageism is “the last acceptable bias,” at least according to the AARP . While age biases are more often directed towards older workers, they work both ways: “Older people and young people alike are often disadvantaged in the workplace, and access to specialized training and education declines significantly with age,” notes the World Health Organization … Specifically, in the workplace, a 2019 study found that one in five American workers aged 40 and over said they faced age discrimination.
But ageism isn’t always obvious discrimination. Sometimes it’s a small comment that subtly perpetuates the idea that ” old” is code for “bad.” Take, forexample, Kevin Hart’sremembered reaction to Don Cheadle’s age. Even the best intentions can turn into ageistic microaggression. Below are common phrases that often do more harm than good when it comes to someone’s age.
“You don’t look like [insert age here]!”
Honorable Mention: 50 is the new 25! Even if you probably meant it as a compliment, most of the time it is assumed that whatever age they really are, it is “bad” for some reason. In this case, you may want to reconsider whether you need to comment on the person’s age at all.
“They are young at heart.”
From the Alliance for Strong Families and Communities :
While these statements are probably intended to convey a positive connotation or are framed as a compliment to another person, they sound with the connotations “young is good”, “older is bad.” We encourage you to think about what you really mean. Do you mean high energy levels? Agility? Sense of humor or playfulness? … Say these words instead of generalizing the perceived characteristics of any generation.
In other words, try to define the compliment you mean by young. In this way, you avoid hints that being “old” is the opposite of who they are.
“Flavored”
Unless you’re talking about adding spice to chicken, “seasoned” is a gentle way of referring to someone as “old.” As with young at heart advice, try to articulate what you really mean — whether it’s a positive meaning, such as “experienced,” or a negative meaning, such as “out-of-the-box.”
“Okay, boomer.”
I admit it. My biggest problem with this line is that it is a hacker comedy at the moment. On a more serious level, OK boomers have the same problem as all millennials as “eligible”. It is lazy and unfair to fire someone solely on the basis of generational stereotypes.
“You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”
This is not even the case in the canine world . You can say it casually without meaning anything. However, sentiment here can do real economic damage when older people are largely seen as learning-disabled and therefore invulnerable.
“How can I help, young lady?”
Why do you call my grandmother a young lady? This is strange and suggests that youth is a compliment and reality is an insult. Hey, maybe you don’t need to tell her age at all.
Young Man, Girl, Kiddo.
If someone is not literally a child, please refrain from these patronizing (and creepy!) Expressions.
“You probably don’t want to use this new platform …” / ” If you have trouble learning the technology …”
Even if you are trying to adjust to older colleagues or family members, it is condescending to assume that they will reject new technology. In the workplace, this can prevent them from accessing opportunities available to the rest of your team. If someone resists the new platform, address it individually, rather than letting it become part of the age stereotype.
Typically, consider whether your comments support the idea that age is a crucial factor in how someone thinks, acts, and offers value. When in doubt, you probably don’t need to give anyone’s age at all.