How to Build Meaningful Relationships According to Plato
When we are younger, perhaps our relationship is more physical than spiritual and emotional. But at the heart of any lasting relationship is a certain kind of love, and at the heart of this spiritual connection are the teachings of the philosopher Plato.
What is Platonic Love?
You’ve probably heard about the concept of “platonic friendship” or “platonic ideal”. These terms arose from the thoughts of Plato, but they were not invented by the philosopher himself. The idea that two people can have a fulfilling relationship devoid of sexual touch grew out of an extrapolation from Plato’s Symposium , in which Socrates describes the human understanding of love as a ladder. Each level of the ladder indicates a higher level of love, from the fascination with a beautiful body to the love of beauty itself.
In an abbreviated form, the ladder looks something like this: love for a beautiful body, love for all physical beauty, then a greater respect for mental beauty than for physical beauty. Ultimately, this is replaced by a love of the beauty of knowledge, and then, finally, a love of beauty itself.
Plato’s idea of love as conceptualized at the time was very different from how we understand it today. First, romantic love in 5th century Greece was reserved for homosexual relationships between men who married women only for reproductive needs . The concept of love as a ladder was given new life in the 15th century thanks to the work of the Italian scientist Marsilio Ficino, who, according to Slate , was the first to use the term “platonic love” or “amor platonicus”.
According to Ficino’s interpretation, the highest level of love was not sexual desire, but was associated with something much more spiritual, and wrote that love “does not want this or that body, but wants the splendor of divine light shining through the bodies, and is amazed. and I am in awe of it. ” However, since the 16th century, the concept of platonic relationships has been used to clearly describe those in the friendship zone, since platonic love has nothing to do with sex. However, this is just an evolutionary course for the term – and it may not be entirely accurate.
Platonic love still includes a deep spiritual connection that is different from the concept we hear a lot about today. As noted in The Conversation , platonic love is probably best described in the monologue of Aristophanes in the Symposium , who essentially formulated this love as a search for the Platonic ideal of a soul mate:
Love is born in every person; it unites the halves of our original nature; he tries to do one of two things and heal the wound of human nature. Thus, each of us represents the “suitable half” of the human whole … and each of us is always looking for the half that suits him.
This is the essence of Platonism, which Dictionary.com defines as “love for the idea of beauty, seen as the final evolution from the pursuit of individuality and love of physical beauty to love and contemplation of spiritual or ideal beauty. “
This can affect your approach to finding a partner or improving your relationship with your current partner.
How Platonic Love Can Help Your Relationship
While sex is important, you can remember Plato by thinking of your relationship as a kind of spiritual fusion. You’re not so much connected with the person’s body as with their soul, or maybe it’s a freer, more abstract idea of what their love means to you that keeps the flame alive.
The base attraction – or the first rung of the ladder – is what forms a bond or stimulates the desire to join forces. From there you climb the stairs until you form a higher plane of understanding each other. This may not have been Plato’s true intention more than 2,000 years ago, but his concept of love could prove useful to anyone building relationships today.