How to Reduce Your Teen’s Risk of Suicide

America’s youth suicide rate has been on the rise since 2007, and the pandemic has only made matters worse . No parent wants to believe that their child might be at risk for suicidal thoughts or attempts, but this is a risk that we all need to be aware of and monitor closely. If you suspect that your child is at risk of suicidality, there are a few things you can do to reduce it.

Dr. Stephanie Samar , a clinical psychologist at the Mood Disorders Center at the Institute of the Child’s Mind , says she has noticed a sharp increase in both anxiety and depressive symptoms among young people.

“It’s just a natural reaction to being cut off from your social world,” says Samar. “And with the intensification of depressive symptoms, we often see an increase in suicidal thoughts or suicidal thoughts … In the past year, everyone really struggled; even people who made significant progress before COVID definitely faced some setbacks because of this experience. “

Listen to your gut if you suspect your teen is having suicidal thoughts.

You are an expert on your child and may be the first to sense that something is wrong. Symptoms of depression may include changes in sleep patterns, a sudden lack of interest in activities they once loved, changes in eating habits, and sudden weight fluctuations; these are all red flags that they might be fighting against. If you see these kinds of changes, it’s time to start observing them more closely and talking to them about how they are feeling to determine if this is just typical teen behavior or if they are experiencing a clear disturbance in their mood or thoughts.

“Suicidal thoughts, especially self-harm or suicidal gestures, are not the norm,” says Samar. “So if any of this comes up, it’s important to talk to specialists and healthcare providers and try to give your child some support.”

Samar says it may be helpful to recall what the experts have seen in both research and clinical practice – that there are three “functions” or causes of suicidal thoughts. One of them is the desire to escape from inner feelings and thoughts that seem uncontrollable. Another is the feeling that they are a burden for loved ones. Finally, a history of depression or suicidal thoughts increases the likelihood that a person will experience them again. Therefore, if you suspect that he may be having suicidal thoughts, ask him about it .

“We know that the question of whether someone has suicidal thoughts does not generate suicidal thoughts,” says Samar.

And if you really think they can fight it, beyond talking to them and asking mental health professionals for help and support, be sure to limit access to anything you think they can use to try to hurt themselves. … For example, you can put medicines in the bedroom instead of the bathroom.

Talk to your teen about mental health in general

For all its horror, the pandemic was to make us increasingly openly view and talk about our mental health. We have never needed (or struggled to get) self-care as much as we have in the past few months, and talked about the importance of taking care of our mental health as much as we care about our physical health – and modeling how to do it. … is always a good idea. However, it is important to understand that if your teen is having difficulty, he or she may already be talking to someone else, such as a friend.

“I think this is really problematic because we have teenagers who bear each other’s pain, and not adults or trained professionals who will help in such situations,” says Samar.

This is why it is so important to talk to teens about how they are feeling and how their friends are feeling. Parents should always emphasize that if they are seriously concerned about themselves or their peer, share that concern with a trusted adult, even if the adult is not you . They could also talk to an aunt or uncle, a school counselor, teacher, or coach.

Samar says that aside from talking to them about their mental health, it can also be a key to finding meaning in life, for example by setting long-term goals or connecting with a goal – these meaningful connections can be a protective factor against suicidality.

But most importantly: be a good listener.

The need to stop and listen to our kids as they talk about topics big and small seems obvious – and yet we’re a hell of a distraction these days. We talk on the phone, check work messages, try to figure out what to cook for dinner, and our children know when we are not listening to them.

“Try to put aside distractions and really pay attention, show curiosity, ask questions and show that you are listening,” says Samar. “And this is not a one-time experience; do this as often as possible at home. If they feel they are being heard, they are more likely to speak. “

And finally, she says, when they put their trust in you, don’t jump straight into problem-solving mode. Of course , you do not want them to be painful, but what they probably need most at that moment of checking, and to know what they hear and understand.

If you are contemplating suicide or worried about a friend or loved one, the National Suicide Prevention Helpline (1-800-273-8255) answers your calls 24/7.