You Will Never Be Able to Fulfill All Your Social Obligations After the Pandemic.
The Lost of Us have spent the past 15 months fantasizing about all the amazing things we can do when the pandemic marathon reaches its end. We may have even made preliminary plans to finally meet too many people to count. But honestly, it’s entirely possible that you’ve flooded your plate with more post-pandemic plans than you can stomach, especially if you’ve organized a bunch of social events that sound good in theory but that you probably won’t have time for, maybe some day.
While things look good in the short term (the pandemic is waning here in the US, although globally it’s a different story), you need to be realistic about how many opportunities you really have to see the people who really matter to you – and is it worth the time to see those who are not so important.
Post-pandemic social obligations are out of control
Look, you are popular and this is not your fault. All of us who wanted to return to normal life before vaccination are ready to return with enthusiasm to life after injections. If you were planning to see more people than it seems reasonable right now, you have to get a little ruthless.
Reduce your social obligations by 20 percent
Make an honest list of all the people you made plans with. This can include friends, family, acquaintances, online friends, coworkers, old hobbies – anyone. Then do your best to reduce the number of people on it by 20 percent.
Don’t be discouraged by excluding people from your list of commitments; they are likely to do the same to other people, if not you. Maybe you’re even doing them a favor.
Spread your social gatherings throughout the year
Give yourself room to breathe. If you have preliminary plans for a drink or going camping with someone, perhaps put a few less important things in the background. We’ve had a lot of time planning (or developing social anxiety) over the past fifteen months indoors. To add a little more balance to the feeling of being immersed in emptiness, keep your calendar as stretched out as possible so you don’t get overwhelmed. It may seem odd to draw in pencil a date for coffee at the end of summer, but at least you will have it in your books.
You can always flake off
Planning is often just a symptom of boredom. A lot of people do this because getting sounds together is like a good idea, and they do it even if you don’t quite feel like it’s a good gesture. But you have to assess the viability of these plans: were they created because both sides just like the idea of a meeting? Are they plans that would have stalled at the texting stage in the pre-pandemic era? Then don’t let the extra pressure of definitive vaccinations make a difference.
To that end, once you’ve identified which plans (or even which relationships) are unlikely to bear fruit, don’t go out of your way to keep track of them. This is not disrespect for the person or people in question – I am not suggesting that you should ignore people’s attempts to contact you. If someone is particularly adamant about making your plans come true, be sure to mark the date on your lengthened calendar. (It’s okay to follow the road too.) But if they don’t follow it, there is no reason to think that you should do it too.
Even if you are hungry for human contact, there is no reason to turn your return to society into a mad dash to see everyone you haven’t seen since March 2020, especially people you were happy to avoid.