Should I Water Spaghetti on a Ranch Like Saweetie?
Lately I have ended my evenings with one or three episodes of The Sopranos . This is my first time watching the show and I’m (obviously) a fan. My favorite hero? Pasta – or, as my Connecticut boyfriend calls it, half Italian, “pasta.”
Depending on the season and episode, macaroni can get as much screen time as Paulie Walnut. Sopranos always eat pasta. In addition to breakfast, it is present with every meal, often as a complement to an already significant main course. Pasta comes in many shapes, with a variety of sauces, but never from a ranch . After all, who dares to put a store-bought salad dressing on spaghetti? Someone brave, someone cocky, someone like Saweetie.
When I first saw the video of Saweetie pouring over a plate of pasta and ranch sauce, I wasn’t as alarmed as everyone else on Twitter. (My boyfriend is half Italian? Very anxious – even terrified – but Italian Americans love their pasta.) I’m not Italian American. I’m the one who orders pineapple for pizza and sometimes dunk it on the ranch. I also ate spaghetti next to the salad that was ranch-seasoned so I experienced the combination indirectly (and enjoyed it). The combination of flavors did not make much of an impression on me, I say, even if the application of Saweetie was a little harsh.
But the tasting is correct, so I teamed up with Jess from The Root for a little tasting. Jess was much more skeptical than I was – I really wanted to love the spaghetti ranch because I love the ranch and I love spaghetti, and I wanted all the people who bullied Savity about her food choices to be wrong. Unfortunately, things did not go well. I don’t want to spoil the whole video, but I’ll say this: Carmela Soprano would say “basta” to this paste.