How to Be a Parent Like Harry and Meghan
Even those who were looking forward to Oprah’s interview with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle were probably stunned by the various revelations made during last night’s two-hour special . Pick any number of headlines you’ve likely seen by now – from Meghan’s suicidal thoughts to even one royals worrying about how dark their children’s skin can be – and today there is a lot to talk about. But as a parenting writer, I naturally filtered out a lot of their revelations through this lens.
The interview was full of reminders of how good parents put at the heart of the health, safety and happiness of the whole family, even when the right – it is also a difficult task. Here are some parenting lessons we can learn from the decisions Harry and Meghan have made.
You can make tough choices
I have never been a royal family – and have never married a royal family – but I have to imagine that it will be difficult to rip myself and my family out of the powerful centuries-old system that is literally your whole world. Especially when your every move is reported and judged by a group of tabloids who seem to be obsessed with portraying you in the most negative light, I think it would be easier to try to comply than to attract more criticism by trying to carve your own path.
But when they were given the choice between being a true British royal family (no matter how much harassment you get) and breaking free so you and your children can lead a more normal life, they made perhaps a more difficult choice. And by doing so, they set an example to their children (son Archie and daughter Megan) that doing what is right for you, even when it’s difficult, is better than doing what is expected of you. …
We are the best protectors of our children
There are times along the path of every parent when protecting their child becomes necessary, even when it’s difficult or awkward. A parent may have to advocate for their child’s special learning needs at school, despite objections about the services the school wants to provide. Or we may need to provide the mental health services they need on their behalf. In the case of Meghan and Harry, they say they had to defend their son’s physical safety when he was denied a royal title (prince) that would allow him to gain personal safety.
Most of us will never have to stand up to convince your child to get their own safety equipment, but we also don’t need to curtsey to grandma. However, they were ultimately refused, which is at least one of the reasons they took their child and headed for the castle door.
We need to prioritize our own mental health.
When you are a young parent who is struggling with any type of anxiety, depression, or other mental health disorder, it can be difficult to ask for help. After all, this should be the happiest time of your life! It should be related to the child and their needs, not yours. Even in the most “normal” situations, it takes a lot of courage to admit that you are struggling and ask for help.
But when Meghan started having suicidal thoughts – to the point where she attended a royal reception instead of staying at home alone, out of fear of what she might do – she did ask for help. She told her husband how she felt and said that she asked for the help of an older member of the royal family (and she was told that it would not be possible for her to seek inpatient treatment).
Even now, such a public and vulnerable conversation about her experience sends an important message to all new parents – and her own children. If you are struggling, ask for help; because everyone deserves the help they need without feeling ashamed of needing it.
It is important to confront bullies
Most parents want their children to fend for themselves. But when you are royalty, you are more often than not expected to hold your tongue for the greater good (of the family). However, it is bullshit when you face racism not only from the public and the media, but also within your own family.
By detailing how they felt they were mistreated and silenced, Harry and Meghan show their children an example of how their voices matter – even (or maybe especially) when you oppose a creature much more bigger than yourself.
Rescuing animals is a good thing
Perhaps in the most enjoyable moment of the interview, Oprah visits the couple’s home in Montecito, California, where they live with their son and two family dogs (at least one of which, according to Meghan, she rescued from a Kentucky hideout). Dogs certainly make wonderful pets, as do chickens that the family recently rescued from a factory farm. They even built a chicken coop that says Archie’s Chicken: Established 2021, which is all sorts of helpful and cute.