Improve the Art of Passive-Aggressive Texting
I once told my mother-in-law several years ago that she always looked annoyed in text messages. “What “Why?” she asked, clearly surprised.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I think all periods. For example, when I asked if it was a good time for us to drop in at 3 pm today, you answered, “Okay.” You might mean, “Of course it works for me!” but I read it like “wow, great, they go to 3” “.
My sister-in-law then helpfully intervened to support me: “Yes, you need more emoticons too.”
Fortunately, I can report that today my mother-in-law is a very funny text message with lots of exclamation marks, laughing crying faces and heart emoji scattered throughout her messages. She was not trying to convey any hidden, passive-aggressive message about her contempt for me (we really like each other!).
But perhaps you still don’t want to use a less passive-aggressive tone in your lyrics; maybe there are times when you really want to convey such a message. If so, there are several techniques you can use to make the person at the other end of the text wonder if they are annoying you.
Why do you need this? There are many reasons to be so frustrated with someone that you would resort to passive-aggressive texting. Perhaps they are too late to pick you up again. Or perhaps they were passive-aggressive with you at first. (You can always put “Sure” on “K”.) If you find yourself in this position, follow these rules to spell the correct answer: “I think they are mad at me, but I cannot.” Say absolutely. ”Tone.
Use many periods
If you looked into Lifehacker’s weakness, do you know what you would see? Mostly memes, tweets we like, and job conversations riddled with exclamation marks, that’s what. Consider the takeaway from my recent conversation with our editor-in-chief and managing editor about whether we have rights to use certain images in multiple posts (none of us were sure about the answer):
Pay attention to the ratio of the bold exclamation mark to the period. Exclamation marks convey friendliness in text messages! Spells convey severity. Why? NPR explains :
Celia Wedge, a psychology professor at Binghamton University, says the period can inadvertently set the tone because while text messaging can function as speech, it lacks many of the expressive features of face-to-face verbal communication, such as “facial expressions, tone of voice, our ability stretch words, speak louder, pause. “
Our language has evolved, and “what we did with our incredible linguistic genius was finding ways to insert this kind of emotional interpersonal information into text messages using what we have,” Wedge said. “We have dots, emoticons and other punctuation marks. Therefore, people have changed the point in the meaning of something else. “
And this is something else – passive aggression.
In particular, the combination of typically positive words (okay, okay, of course) with a serious dot can create confusion as to whether the lyricist is just formal or is really mad at you.
Messages should be short (but not sweet)
Monosyllabic answers are best if you are trying to give someone a passive-aggressive elbow blow. In one-word answers, you almost don’t need a period (but use it anyway for added effect). This leaves the recipient feeling as if something is left unsaid. Consider these two examples:
Scenario 1
Person # 1: Hello! Would it be great if I stop by today to leave the cookies I baked for you?
Person # 2: Of course.
Scenario 2
Person # 1: Hello! Would it be great if I stop by today to leave the cookies I baked for you?
Person # 2: Of course it would be great.
The second scenario is: “Okay, this person seems happy that I will bring them cookies, they are just a little formal in the text.” The first scenario is, “Damn it, they hate my cookie!”
Absolutely zero emoticons
There is no place for emoji in passive-aggressive texting. Smilies help us convey emotions that our words and punctuation sometimes cannot convey. Scenario 1 above, for example, would look completely different if person number two added a yum emoticon after him to indicate that he is looking forward to some good treats. Emoticons soften our words and help reveal the secret of our feelings, and right now we are looking for tougher and more mysterious answers.
There is one exception: one thumbs up. There is nothing more passive-aggressive than one thumbs up. Even a double thumbs up is enthusiastic; a single thumb up seems more like a middle finger.
Don’t answer at all
In some cases, the most passive-aggressive response is no response at all. If the conversation is over, that’s one thing. At some point, someone needs to pause the dialogue. But if that silence comes after the other person says something like, “I’m so sorry I had to cancel our dinner plans again! I swear this is the last time! ”And you send them radio silence, I would say that you are actually answering loudly and clearly.