Can Happiness Courses Really Make You Happier?

When Christa signed up for the Science of Happiness course at UC Berkeley, she didn’t know what to expect. The closest she has done before is personal development boot camp, to which a small dose of positive psychology has been added. But after overcoming fundamental differences in her marriage, she says the course influenced her decision to divorce.

“Two things helped,” she recalls. “One is about predictors of divorce, and the other is about the happiness of couples with and without children. Both groups had the same overall happiness, but couples without children had fewer ups and downs.

“The crux of our problem was that I changed my mind about children because of health problems,” she says. “Before, I could talk to him about everything that bothered me. But it was such a conflict of interest that I could not count on his support. “

Instead of turning to self-help books or YouTube, thousands of people like Christa took online courses to get back to the basics of basic emotional skills. There may be thousands of people across America now contemplating divorce, but just as many hours are devoted to studying the evidence of how to live well.

Learn Techniques For Free Anywhere

Emiliana Simon-Thomas co-developed and runs a free online course, The Science of Happiness, which Christa took back in 2014 when it launched. The course, which is hosted by EdX, summarizes the latest evidence from a range of practices (gratitude, self-compassion, flow seeking) over a ten-year period.

She says she practiced the mindfulness, forgiveness and reconciliation tips from the course during her isolation:

I exercise my apology and forgiveness muscles very carefully. And I don’t have a really strict, formal, like 45-minute practice of “ sitting on a pillow with a candle in front of me ”, but I try to be aware of what is happening in my mind and body throughout this period. day.

“We were very surprised at first,” says Simon-Thomas. “To be honest, on a personal level, it was very important to me. This gave me a strong sense of the meaning of my work. I am still overwhelmed by this. ” To date, 600,000 people have registered, and in April, daily registrations tripled.

“It’s partly a bit sobering because it makes me realize the need,” she explains, “and how much people seek support, help, and an understanding of where their happiness comes from. People’s lives are changing. “

Strive to practice new skills

Another popular course in the evidence for happiness is the Yale Science of Wellbeing course. Launched free online in 2018, it has been used by over two million people since then. Laurie Santos says his popularity was “a little surreal, to be honest.”

Free online access to the course and the evidence base were important to Santos:

I wanted everyone to be able to explore this content for free. And the emphasis on evidence-based evidence was critical. I myself am a scientist, so I didn’t want to give people platitudes.

When we write this article by email, she explains that she is trying to practice what she preaches. I first get her email explaining that she is cutting down on time spent on email and giving an FAQ. Currently developing a new version of the class for younger students, Santos is also working on the Happiness Lab podcast and still needs time to talk to her students.

“The main way to protect myself is to say ‘no’ a lot and do more to conserve my time, so that I have a place for friends, family, students and the people I love. But it’s difficult, she adds, and it takes work. “

Remember what you already know

Unlike Christa, Nicola (an immigrant who recently moved to the United States) had already made life-changing decisions before joining Wellbeing Science. Last summer she left her job in the UK, moved to another country and got married. She found that she needed a little extra support to cope with:

Even though it was great, there were a lot of different things to juggle: longing for family and friends, not having a steady job, establishing new relationships, getting married and moving around a new country. I underestimated the impact of all these changes. I am quite a resilient person, in general I am good at handling change. But there were a few moments where I got a little flustered.

Nicola had previously completed a yoga teacher training course, so she was already familiar with some of the course content. According to her, she really appreciated the structure and commitment of the course: “I already knew and practiced many of the tools. It shed some light on these things and was like, “Okay, you know how to do this, so work on them.” She has now completed a course at Yale University and recently found a new job.

Improving communication in blocking mode

2020 was the year most of us learned the true meaning of the word “home fever”. For Professor Jay Bucky, astronaut and physician, this was the perfect time to open PATH to the public for free. PATH and its sister Expedition-APPP are designed as training programs for astronauts. They cover conflict resolution, stress management, and mood improvement.

“I was very surprised at how international it has become,” recalls Professor Bucky. “People came to us from Poland, Brazil, many English-speaking countries – Australia, New Zealand, Great Britain. I think a lot of problems are the same everywhere. “

Given the popularity of this program in isolation, Professor Bucky and his team hope to make the program more modular – more “choose and choose” – and introduce refresh classes for returning students who want to refresh their knowledge rather than repeat it.

John moved in with his partner during the isolation and says that he and his partner have “never really fought before.” He says PATH techniques (namely Fair Fighting) helped reduce the intensity of the fighting and the time it takes to recover.

Although he sometimes found advice that was more directed towards teams, he found the advice useful: “I used a lot of resources to try to fight with my partner, with whom I moved to too small neighborhoods due to the pandemic, do not escalate and we decide theirs is fair. ” He adds that he also found de-escalation methods helpful when the police were called to a neighbor and he intervened.

Professor Bucky himself says that he regularly used interest-based negotiation and purposeful breathing, but even for him, it’s important to keep these skills in mind when you need them. “In an isolated, closed environment, people say, ‘I couldn’t remember this when I needed it.’ I always have to say to myself, “Wait, I know how to handle this.” He laughs: “I need to take a step back and do what we built this program about.”

Avoid using courses to seal cracks

Nicky Walton-Flynn, a 10-year psychologist and psychotherapist, agrees that courses that offer basic guidance like CBT can be helpful in changing negative thinking patterns. Likewise, courses on behavior change as well as mindfulness apps (she recommends Headspace clients) are absolutely calming for busy minds.

But for all the support they offer, she says they are not a substitute for treatment: “If someone has an attachment disorder, personality disorder, or has experienced trauma, they try to work on emotional regulation without individual support from the person. a trained therapist can be very dangerous. For me, emotional regulation means re-learning trust, changing neural connections, and working with somatic responses with another person — not with an app or alone. ”

For example, the practice of gratitude is encouraged at certain stages of therapy, but as Walton-Flynn explains, some clients need to express legitimate anger before they can reach the place of gratitude:

It is precisely these minor aspects of online courses that I fear. Vulnerable people usually feel that they are at fault and that they need to fix themselves by doing some mindful meditation and practicing gratitude. These practices may work, but not by themselves. They need the support of a group or other people.

For example, to help you cope with a little work stress or to relocate, courses are well suited. But the hard line is that mental health deserves more: “If you are struggling with a comorbid disorder or trauma, or a DSM-V recognized diagnostic condition, then these disorders need to be worked out with a therapist. … “

When I think of happiness, I see empty beaches, wire-haired terriers, and dark chocolate right out of the fridge. I don’t see my therapist mourning over Zoom, getting divorced, or watching Coursera lectures. But as Christa explains, looking back at her marriage, “It was impossible to reconcile our differences. I left so that he could achieve his life goal, so that I did not have to live a life of guilt. ” Sometimes happiness comes from agonizing choices.

Happiness also comes from non-sexual commitment. Courses like Berkeley and Yale and programs like Dartmouth don’t promise, but to thousands of students they reveal the simple and proven truth about a better life.