Apply for a $ 10K Job to Keep Track of Your Toilet Habits
In late 2019, Tushy announced their # Bidet2020 campaign. This ended up being oddly prophetic for two reasons. First, the hashtag looks like a funny typo promoting the now-supposed Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden. And then comes the panic / shortage of toilet paper, which has so far led to a steady stream of bidet sales throughout the year. And if you’re the one who either jumped (or sat) on the footrest of the bidet, or are still curious about the bidet, Tushy (who, you probably guessed, does the bidet) has a job for you: VP Fecal Matters … Here’s what the job entails and how you can apply.
What kind of work is this?
From the description , this position is a combination of research, observation, use of a bidet, and posting it all on social media. The successful candidate will test and study their personal pooping habits and document their findings on Tushy’s social media, reporting to CEO Dr. Mark Hyman.
This 3-month fart contract takes 30 to 60 minutes a day, depending on how long it takes you to work, and is done completely remotely from the comfort of your home bathroom. For the role under the contract, $ 10,000 is paid. Some of the other tasks involved are :
- Minimum 90 days of bidet dedication
- Analyzing and documenting your own daily pooping habits
- Ask those closest to you about pooping habits
- Testing TUSHY products against other bathroom products and brands
- Pro-deuce video content for social media
- Testing and Debunking Myths About Gut and Buttock Health
- Pooping a lot
“For many Americans, getting money for poop is purely desirable,” Tushy CEO Jason Oyalvo said in a statement emailed to Lifehacker. “Our new VP of Faecal Affairs will be the change we want to see in every bathroom and must be ready to sit down and stand up for a revolution in the way people poop.”
What qualifications do you need for this position?
Although yes, everyone poops , but not everyone is suitable for this particular role. Here’s what Tushi is looking for in a candidate:
- A real pooping person with 21-121 years of experience poops.
- Communication skills associated with pungent poop
- Possess incredible precision spraying skills
- Strong skills and abilities to control urination
- Hard … or poor knowledge of the Bristol Stool Table.
- Ability to prioritize in difficult, dynamic * or constipated * conditions
- Adopts an “open door” policy when discussing what’s going on in the bathroom.
- Possibility to install the TUSHY bidet on a standard toilet
How can I apply?
If all of this sounds like what you like, fill out the job posting form and submit a short 60-90 second video explaining why you are the best person to fill this hole in the company. Submission of applications July 7, 2020
The top five candidates will then move on to a Zoom interview where they will need to educate the Tushi team and fans about how they will spend their time as Vice President of Fecal Matters. Interviews will take place on Tuesday 14 July and recruitment will begin on 22 July.
One thing to keep in mind: The fine print at the bottom of the app page makes it clear that by simply submitting an app video, you are confirming that their video “may be used on the Tushy website in the sole and exclusive discretion of Tushy. ” And that’s not all:
The Video Submission grants Tushy and its agents an unlimited, worldwide, perpetual, free, non-exclusive license and the right to publish, use, exploit, commercialize, create derivative works, improve, adapt, edit, distribute, publicly perform and / or modify the Video Apps in any way. , on any media, without restrictions and without taking into account the interests of the participant.
Presumably, if you’re applying for a job that includes posting your pooping habits on social media, you’re probably comfortable talking about it by now. (Which is good! It helps reduce the stigma associated with body functions and the reality of having a human body.) And if you are unable to take on that role, Tushy is also running a competition to come up with its next ad campaign. The main prize is $ 10,000.
For anyone applying for Opportunity # 1 or # 2 – we hope the process goes smoothly.