Create a “note Wall” for Your Child
A few years ago, my mother-in-law bought my six-year-old daughter books on reading and math. When I asked my daughter if she would like to look at them, she just looked at the big intimidating stack and said, “No thanks.” It’s okay – she is in kindergarten, and I was not going to rush.
Later, however, I leafed through the books and thought that some of the activities could be quite fun and rewarding. So I decided to do a little experiment: I ripped out a page, glued it to the edge of our kitchen island (which we go through several times a day) and see if she noticed it. She did it that evening. Without prompting, she quietly grabbed a pen, sat down on the floor, and filled out a worksheet. That’s all! I didn’t say “Nice job!” or something like that – instead, when she left for school the next day, I just took off the completed page and put in a new one. And then she finished too. So I put one more, another and another.
I began to think that I could show other things that I would like her to see. This can be a “comment wall” – a space without pressure in which we can write notes to each other, ask questions, write down funny things we have learned, and make plans. Now, using scrap paper and washi tape, I keep adding new thoughts and hints: “What would you like to learn to cook?” “Let’s write some poems.” “What would you like to play in our fort ?” She can answer whatever she wants, at a convenient time for her, if she wants. We’ve also pasted love notes and apology letters on the wall.
When it comes to learning, the comment wall has become a way for me to engage my daughter in meaningful reading. Daniel T. Willingham, professor of psychology at the University of Virginia and author of Parenting Children to Read, told me that parents can help children read by using situations in which reading has some benefit. The wall definitely does. My daughter wrote that she would like to make lemnatd (lemonade) someday, so we plan to do it this summer. Sometimes I add “educational” passages – her teacher says she wrote her “Ps” backwards, so I recently jotted down a few pages of practice. She rummaged through them with the same zeal as into everything else. (I’m not sure I would have received such an enthusiastic response if I hovered over her and said, “Track these letters now.”
Most importantly, however, the comment wall has become another way for me and my daughter to connect. I look forward to looking at the wall every day, and I think so too. I hope that we will always find a way to write to each other about everything and everything without judgment.
If you are creating an observation wall, the first good rule of thumb is: Don’t talk about the observation wall, or at least don’t talk too much about it. You don’t even need to name the wall. Let it just sit and become a quiet place for thought, hope, and curiosity.
And sometimes poems about farting. My daughter wrote one on the wall the other day, and I keep it forever.
This story was originally published in 2019 and updated with new information on 02/20/2020.