How to Be a Good Friend of Someone Struggling With Depression, According to Reddit
Talking to a friend who is struggling with their mental health is difficult. You may be worried about saying the wrong thing or harassing them with too many phone calls and text messages. On Reddit, u / burnie57 asked users how to help a friend struggling with depression – and while everyone is different and needs communication to understand their needs, there are things you can do to become a good friend to someone who might be going through a difficult time. time.
Send them the verification text
When you have the opportunity, send your friend a text message from time to time, according to SensieNemo .
A friend of mine is depressed and recently told me that she really appreciates what I write to her, even if she hasn’t answered for a while. What I usually do when I don’t hear from her is send her GIFs and she will send some back. And sometimes it’s just ten gifs with a waving animal and the words “hello!”, But she said that it helps her a lot. While it might just be her thing, I really don’t know.
In Cut , Dr. Laura Rosen, a clinical psychologist, explained that simple text can go a long way. “Depressed people will tell me that just by knowing what a friend thinks of them, maybe a friend invited them to a play, but they are not really ready for it, they say it was nice just thinking about them.” And try not to make them answer. GIF, photo, or just “How are you?” may be good.
Invite them on specific occasions
As we wrote earlier , always offer specific suggestions to communicate. Xevifract offers to send them an invitation to escape.
[…] I had a friend who noticed when I became quiet and withdrawn. She asked me to accompany her on an errand. At first I answered her “no”, but then she said how we would help each other, and then I agreed.
I walked, talked with someone, looked at things in perspective and knew that yes, she didn’t need me, but she wanted me to be there. She took care of the part of me that was hidden and broken, when most people didn’t even know it existed … It’s like a little bump or jolt that gets you back on track.
And invite them for any reason, even if they don’t show up (and without putting any pressure on them), as Stopcounting writes.
My best friend invites me to EVERYTHING … Literally out of every twenty invitations, I could appear once. But he invited me all the time. If I say I’m going and leaving school at the last minute, he’s never angry. He just says, “Maybe next time!”
In the end, when I started to get out of it, I would get an invitation and really quit. It was amazing for me, because it is really difficult to return to social life after I dropped out of school for a few months when everyone turned down the invitation.
He says that he knows that I almost never come and do not feel any pressure, but he wants me to know that I am always welcome.
Don’t tell them to “cheer up”
While you can give a friend advice, it’s usually best to just listen. And whatever you do, don’t tell them “cheer up.” Thedaythemusicdied37 agrees.
Don’t tell them that they just have to think positively to get better. If it were that easy, they would have done it already. In fact, don’t act like there is some simple cure. This makes the person feel like you are not taking their problem seriously and are devaluing their experience. The people who told me to think positively and go to the gym more often during my darkest depression made me feel so frustrated and misunderstood.
Instead, just listen and confirm what you heard. “What I hear from depressed people is that if someone says it’s going to help, it’s not very helpful and is actually very annoying,” Rosen said in an interview with Cut . “It’s more helpful to say,“ I understand how difficult your times are, but I’m going to be here. I’m going to see you through this. You probably won’t believe it, but it will pass. I know this is really bad. “
Finally, know when to intervene and when not.
If you feel like your friend is at risk of self-harm or is trying to commit suicide, it might be time to step in. As crunchatize-me-daddy writes , it depends on the individual.
Talk to them several times about seeking professional help because this person will be able to analyze each unique person to help them. If things have gone too far with a friend in terms of life threats or actual suicide attempts, you are not a bad guy as long as you tell his parents / someone who can intervene and give them the right treatment.
And if you’re worried about how to approach a treatment conversation, 6ixgodess has experience- based advice .
A long time ago, before I really understood what was going on with the way I was feeling, a close friend told me very caringly that she didn’t know how to help me anymore and that I needed to seek help from someone who knows what he is doing. I really love how they said she wanted to help but put the line to both herself and my well-being.
For the rest of the thread’s replies, visit Reddit .