Top Tips for Teens of 2018
Each stage of education has its own problems. There is a newborn phase where you don’t know what the hell you are doing, a toddler phase where they won’t stop yelling at you, and a school age phase where you need to re-learn basic math. to help them with their homework.
And then, when we feel that we are in a good rhythm, they become adolescents, and we must learn to raise children again. Whoever came up with the phrase “little kids, little problems; big kids, big problems. ” This year we’ve put together a whole bunch of parenting tricks for teenagers, starting with this tip:
Don’t give alcohol to teens
You might think that letting your teenager drink alcohol at home is a safer alternative to partying with friends, or that it teaches them to use alcohol responsibly and therefore prevents college binge drinking. But researchers disagree .
Australian researchers followed 1,927 teenagers for six years and found that those whose parents gave them alcohol for one year were twice as likely to find alcohol from other sources the next year. In addition, by the end of the study, 81% of teens who drank alcohol from their parents and other sources reported binge drinking (defined as four or more standard drinks at a time), compared with 62% of teens who drank alcohol from their parents. only non-parent sources. And adolescents who received alcohol from their parents were more likely to have symptoms of an alcohol use disorder than those who did not receive alcohol from any source.
What to do if your teenager hates you
Because they will most likely do so . Most likely. At least for a while (maybe longer, depending on how stupid you are). But let’s all agree that 1. Keep calm and 2. Don’t take it personally and 3. Tell friends who have teenagers who hate them.
According to (family therapist Asher) Brauner, parents are often more of a problem than their teenagers. They overreact when their teens get annoyed or roll their eyes. They take it personally , thinking that I did not raise you to do such things . “Parents who take every minor provocation personally signal to their teens that they are so strong that their every move could ruin their parents’ day,” says Brauner. “This is a stupid message.” When the world of adolescents becomes uncertain, they seek safety by testing their parents. When they lash out, they implicitly ask you, “Can I still trust you to be strong?” The way to say yes, says Browner, is to not let them piss you off.
Beware of the “choking game”
Children strangle each other – and themselves – as a way to feel a kind of tingling sensation, and this, which is quite obvious to us, is very dangerous. And they probably know this, but while their underdeveloped frontal lobes seem like a good idea.
Be aware of warning signs that your child may be choking, including bloodshot eyes, complaints of headaches, marks on the neck, unusual privacy requirements, or unexplained items such as elastic cords or leashes. However, there are often no signs. Eric Robinson, a 12-year-old boy whose death in 2010 inspired the Eric Case, died after playing the game for the first time. He tried it because he wanted to clear up his homework.
Talk to the children about the dangers of playing without explaining how to play it. “Never point to the neck, because if you point to the neck, you are inadvertently showing them how to do it,” write Stephanie Small and Judy Rogg, who developed a school intervention program to train parents, teachers and students in choke play. They encourage parents to teach their children to say no if anyone ever asks them to play.
Give them a code to get out of tricky situations
There may come a time when your child is in a situation that makes him uncomfortable, but does not want to be bullied for leaving early. It is then that he writes you a predetermined code word, and you call him to help out, telling him that something has happened, and you “need” to immediately come for him.
(Father Bert) Fulkes writes that there is an important prerequisite for using this system: “The X-Plan comes with an agreement that we will not make judgments or ask questions.” This means that even if you pick up your baby and he smells like Jägermeister and cigarette smoke, even if he is 10 miles from where he should be, even if she pulled you out of bed at 3 a.m. and your first instinct is demand immediately after a full explanation, you must remain calm and allow the child to tell you as much or less as he wants. It’s hard, it’s so hard , but the goal of making a plan is for your kids to use it and avoid potentially bad things. Fulks believes that holding back in these situations builds trust, and in return, your kids are more likely to be the ones to start the conversation on their own.
Give them all the screen time
Tired of seeing your child’s face hidden behind a screen? Tired of arguing over screen restrictions and then trying to enforce them? What if you throw up your hands, give up and let them have all the screen time they could possibly want … on one condition.
On days when my kids are out of school, they have four tasks they must complete before being allowed to dive into their screens: an hour of exercise, an hour of creative activity, an hour of reading, and an hour of housework before starting them. devices stick to their faces.
Need more? Because we always have more. Here’s everything we’ve celebrated for teens this year (and years past!)