Talk to Your Newborn the Way You Talk to Your Older Children
In preparing for life with a newborn, I’ve heard a lot of advice on how to help my 5-year-old daughter Maggie transition into her role as an older sister, whose title she’s not exactly thrilled with . “Read her some great books for brothers and sisters,” people say. (Done.) “Let her help.” (Definitely.) “Give her a gift from a child.” (Okay, although I’m pretty sure she understands that the fetus hasn’t had time to rake in the currency in its mother’s womb.)
However, I keep thinking about what a friend and three children once said at dinner. “Talk to your newborn the way you talk to Maggie,” she said. She explained that if I help Maggie with something and the baby starts crying, I shouldn’t just drop everything and rush to him. Instead, I have to say, ” You gotta wait, baby, ” before changing the task. The idea is not that I should expect my newborn to understand the concept of patience (because ha!) – rather, it is to show everyone in the family that they are equally valuable.
I plan to use this advice. While I fully expect there will be some jealousy, I hope my daughter doesn’t feel like she’s dropped in the priority rankings these early days with her new baby. I want her to know that every child is loved in our home, but when it comes to getting Mom and Dad’s attention, every child has to queue up.