Fight Your Kids Sportscast
Listening to your kids fighting is a practice of restraint. You want to jump, rip up mom or dad ‘s voice and remind them that you didn’t give them siblings so they can spend their days screaming about whose cheese cracker tastes better. However, as we know, there are good reasons for allowing children to get into some kind of healthy conflict .
Does this mean we should sneak out, put on our headphones and watch Sherlock fight to see who gets the green cup? Unfortunately no.
Early childhood expert Janet Lansbury teaches parents to support their children in their power struggles so they can learn to cope when adults are not around. We can do this by “highlighting” their conflicts, she said . It means accepting what you see without judgment. You are not trying to find out the intentions of your children or those who are to blame; you are simply stating the facts. You are Marv Albert acting out the play.
For example, if Kean grabbed the hula-hoop from Blakely, the usual parenting reaction might be, “You stole this from her and now she is sad! It was despicable. Say you’re sorry! “But with these words you project your fears onto the children, turning one child into a villain and another into a victim, even though this may not be the case at all. Young children, as Lansbury says in his podcast , “have no preconceived notions of what is right and what is fair.” Maybe little Kian just thought, “Oh, this toy looks funny.” Or maybe he was thinking about something else. It doesn’t really matter and you don’t need to figure it out.
Instead, Lansbury recommends “broadcast sporting events” by objectively describing what is happening. “Looks like you both want a hula hoop. It’s hard when two people are holding onto the same toy. ” And it’s all. Be brief and let the children draw their own conclusions. They can keep fighting or let go.
The Lansbury teachers’ message is that “when we do less, kids think and learn more.” This technique can be useful in all types of wrestling – Priya’s tower keeps toppling over as she adds the last block, Timmy can’t seem to get to the last monkey bar and he gets upset, Riley wants more time to play, but it’s time to go home.
Of course, children will sometimes seek advice. If they need more help on your part, Lansbury suggests asking them questions. “Looks like Shane wants to wear the pot like a hat and Jessa wants to put sand in it. What can you both do? “She also notes that there will be times when sports broadcasting is not enough and physical intervention is necessary, such as when children are destructive or have security problems.
In general, however, it is worth thinking less about intervention. Be there, but not out of the way.