Stop Asking the Child About Their Day.
Don’t ask your child what happened that day at school. Just don’t.
Look, I understand: you want to know how your child’s day went. Whether they are 5 or 15 years old, you want to know every detail: who they talked to, what they found out how impressed or scared their teacher was by their behavior, who was cruel to them, who they were with … and so on and so forth and farther.
This habit has two possible outcomes: First, they are not going to do it. At best, you will get a sullen grunt or “Nothing.” They are tired. School is draining. If they were teenagers, they had to get up early and their circadian rhythms turned them into nocturnal creatures. Even if this is an unusual child who jumps out of bed in the morning, he has just gone through academic and social problems. The school took its toll. They don’t go to school now. What is the last thing they want to talk about? School. School is what ended. And now you demand a summary. No.
Second, they will do it because they see how much you want it and feel generous, or they are natural born people that people like, which is probably not the quality you want to encourage. But they won’t be happy about it. You don’t want your child to just sag under the weight of all your desire, do you? Of course not.
And you are not fooling anyone with these “questions about school that are not” how was your day, “supposedly designed to get your child to talk . “What was the best part of your day? What was the worst part of your day? What are you most grateful for today? If your day could be a song, what would it be? What’s the funniest thing that happened today? “It’s even worse. It’s horrible. Your child sees right through them, and you.
Try this instead: When you reunite at the end of the day, look at them and say, “Hi, I’m so glad to see you.” Then shut up. (You can add, “How are you?” Especially if they look worried.) Or talk about something else, about what you’re going to dinner that night, or an inspirational video about a cat and dog being the best. friends. And, of course, they may decide to really talk about school at this point or later – during dinner or before bed. But you’re not not asking them in an attempt to get them to tell you things anyway, are you? Of course not.