Create a Family Pet Contract so You Don’t Get Hung up on All the Dirty Work
The process of adopting a pet for my family was … unexpected. One Saturday, when my six-year-old son had a date in the backyard with his cousin and his best friend, a preschooler, a black cat came to visit us. For them, the cat was more exciting than the waterslide and ice cream I brought. They squealed, stroked him, and pursued him. Soon the cat began to come more often, to walk with my son and his grandmother to school, to wander around the door of our patio. My husband started serving food and water. My son named the cat Sammy. Everyone started calling Sammy our cat.
I, on the other hand, was very hesitant to leave him – we never had pets, and I just knew that all the dirty work would remain with me.
But pets are good for kids!
Friends told me that there are many benefits to having a pet next to young children . They will learn to empathize. They will learn responsibility. They will learn how to communicate better with others. I also knew that my family members would sneak Sammy into the house when I was not around. “And anyway,” said one of the friends, “he chose you. You can’t say no! “
So, after much persuasion and persuasion, I finally gave up. We could leave him.
Okay, first of all, the rules!
I need my family to know that I am serious about everyone sharing the responsibility of caring for Sammy, and the best way to make a promise is to get it in writing. So I searched the internet for a pet contract that I found acceptable , and then laid out my own additional conditions for having a cat in the house: First, Sammy had to be neutered. He needed to get all the vaccinations and check for fleas at the veterinarian.
Secondly, the contract was binding: food and water were the lot of my son; the litter box belonged to my husband. Third, if Sammy ever hurt a child, he was gone. This was not negotiable. By that time, my son and my husband were in love with Sammy – so they signed a contract.
Here are some tips for drafting your own pet contract:
- Discuss the terms of the contract in advance. It may be easier for you to feed your pet during the day if you are the first at home. Your kids may prefer to walk the dog after school. If everyone has a say in the negotiations, they will feel more interested.
- Treat the event with real formality. As with signing this contract, sit down with everyone involved and discuss the agreement, and then sign it together. Get your cake to celebrate!
- Place the contract so that everyone can see it regularly. Ours is on a shelf by Sammy’s kitchenette in the kitchen and can be easily seen.
Happy, plump ending
Four months later, Sammy firmly became the third child in my family. In retrospect, the pet contract was as much for me as it was for my son and my husband. It turned out to be an important life lesson for all of us: it reinforced our family’s commitment to caring for Sammy together.
The biggest thing he did was live up to everyone’s expectations. If Sammy needs food or water, my son refills his bowls without whining. (“Mom, this is the best job in the world!” He says.) If the litter box is full and there’s even a little grunt about it, I’ll return my husband to the contract. (Read: I never need to clean a litter box. Never.)
Everyone knew that I didn’t want Sammy to begin with, so I never had to do the dirty work, I just followed the terms of the contract. But then, of course, the guy grew up on me. As it turned out, Sammy loved me the most and wanted to sleep next to me and cuddle, mostly with me. He also regularly brings me dead lizards.
So, despite the contract with the pet, feeding Sammy, cleaning his fur and caring for him are now shared responsibilities in our family, and we all don’t mind.
But I still don’t clean the litter box.