When Speaking in Public, Look at Individuals, Not the Entire Group.
The next time you’re asked to hold a meeting, hold a class, or give a speech, here’s one way to get everyone’s attention: look at individuals instead of letting your gaze dwell on the entire group.
When giving your speech or presenting information, make eye contact with one of your audience members. Pick a person who is already looking at you; it’s not Glare of Shame trying to pull someone off the phone. After a short relationship, make eye contact with the other person – and, most likely, several more pairs of eyes will already be turned in your direction.
We are attracted by attention, especially if it is not directed at us
That’s why this method works: people get attention. When you look someone in the eye, others will notice that you are paying attention to someone. They will start watching you more closely; firstly, to see what you are doing, and secondly, because they hope that next time you will pay attention to them.
This method also works because eye contact is a powerful tool. When you make eye contact with someone else, you invite them to interact with you, and they immediately become more receptive to what you have to say. This is the kind of skill that politicians and motivational speakers learn – and so do you.
Want to see this technique in action? Check out Amanda Palmer’s The Art of Asking Questions in TED Talk. During her talk, Palmer discusses the importance of eye contact, while making eye contact with people in her audience. This is part of what makes her TED Talk so compelling; even if she is not looking directly at us, we can see her looking directly at someone and transfer emotions and connection to ourselves.
To master this skill, practice switching focus during a conversation.
I learned the technique of eye contact in graduate school and have practiced and taught it in many classes since then. It takes a bit of work to learn to naturally shift your gaze during a conversation, especially if you focus most of your efforts on trying to remember the material you are presenting!
However, this technique is easy to practice. The next time you are preparing a presentation or lecture, try giving the speech while maintaining “eye contact” with different parts of the room. Make eye contact with the bookshelf. Then make eye contact with the window. Practice shifting your attention from the front of the room to the back, or from left to right — after all, you don’t have to just look people in the front and center in the eyes.
After all, making eye contact during a conversation will be as natural as breathing between sentences. You don’t have to think about it; you will introduce yourself, start your presentation, and automatically start looking for people looking in your direction.
You will probably find public speaking much more enjoyable because you will be fully involved with your material, just like your audience.