Use the “I Allow, You Choose” Strategy to Divide Materials Between Children
“She has more!” “His cup was filled higher!” Her piece is bigger! “” It’s not fair! “
Oh, to be a child faced with a huge injustice in life. When it comes to splitting Cheerios, juice, Lego pieces and cake, there is never real equality. Adults who hear these complaints from children often think that they have only a few options: 1) let them conquer it and hope for the best, 2) take the thing from everyone, stomping and shouting: “That’s it! NOBODY GETS! ”Or 3) Take out the measuring instruments and divide the portions accurately, feeling like a sucker.
There is an easier way. In A Parenting Guide for Game Theorists, authors Paul Raeburn and Kevin Zollman propose a “I Allow, You Choose” strategy that allows parents to create “envy-free” separations .
Just ask one child to split a set of desired items into two shots (or a glass of juice into two cups, or whatnot), and the other child can choose.
The next time they are asked to share, the children will see to it that they are evenly distributed. According to Raeburn, this strategy works well if you take turns choosing who is cutting and who is choosing.