Why People in Need Can Make You Uncomfortable
Of course, people in need can be annoying (and I say this as a very needy person). However, our feelings for someone who is open about their needs is often a reflection of how we feel about our own needs. Like most people, this is difficult. School of Life destroys it.
You may have been dealing with a friend, family member, or acquaintance in need at some point. They write to you, constantly asking for emotional support. They ask why you don’t call and visit more often. There can be many different reasons why you are uncomfortable around someone like this, but here’s one thing to consider: it can be a reflection of your own self-awareness. This is how the School of Life says about it:
“We will feel that someone is nauseatingly ‘in need’ when we do not see ourselves as a suitable target for someone else’s need. Somewhere within, we do not believe that we are reliable, strong, reliable, admirable or decent; we are not quite adults, so those who need something from us seem to be insane and suitable targets for ridicule … At the heart of our hatred of so-called needy people is self-hatred … They rightly believe that demonstrating need is a prerequisite for strength, not weakness. “
It’s a bold statement, but it’s worth considering if you’re pushing away a friend who needs you and isn’t afraid to ask. This is a rewarding perspective if you need it too. If you keep reaching out to someone and they don’t reciprocate, they may not be as comfortable showing themselves as you are. As always, The School of Life demonstrates this beautifully in the video above.
In defense of “needy” people | School of Life (YouTube)