Just Ask People What Gifts They Want.

You will probably spend a month or more before the holidays trying to figure out what gifts to give people and they won’t know. Surprise is half the fun. However, it’s best to just ask.

As CNN explains, while the self-proclaimed secrecy of giving surprise gifts can be fun, it often leads to bad gifts. Sometimes it’s as easy as getting a gift that the person doesn’t really need. However, there is a more sinister trap you can fall into: getting a gift that has the maximum wow factor when they unfold it, but doesn’t make them very happy in the long run:

“Givers choose gifts hoping to make the recipient as happy as possible when they exchange the gift, but recipients prefer gifts that will make them happy while owning and using the gift,” said study co-author Jeff Galak. , Assistant Professor, Department of Marketing, Tepper School of Business, Carnegie Mellon.

In the race for the most impressive gift you can get, it’s easy to overlook what will really make them happy in the long run. Of course, the easiest way to find out what will make them happier is to ask, but we try to avoid this for cultural reasons:

“The best thing donors can do is ask the recipients what they want,” Galak said. “The problem is that it is forbidden in our culture. Somehow, it seems like asking what someone wants makes you, the giver, seem less thoughtful. It is not true. Gift recipients are more satisfied with the requested gifts because this is exactly what they really need. “

The taboo on questions stems from the idea that if you have to ask, you do n’t really know what will make your recipient happy. While it’s nice if someone pays enough attention to remembering the gift you mentioned, it’s a little unfair too. We shouldn’t expect people to read our minds when we have relationship issues , so why expect mind reading when it comes to gifts? It can be awkward in the end, but if you don’t know what to give someone, just ask. That way they will probably be happier than you think.

Think you are a great gift giver? Probably not | CNN

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