Know When You’re Making Bad Excuses by Watching These Two Red Flags.
If you keep catching yourself making excuses and want to change, you need to know how to find excuses early on to stop relying on them. These two traits can help you distinguish between a legitimate reason and lazy excuses.
According to Susan David , author of Emotional Agility: Unleash, Embrace Change, and Succeed in Work and Life , there are two main red flags you should look out for every time you think you’re going to apologize. Stephanie Vozza of Fast Company breaks down both of them:
- Your excuse sounds like an old story . “If you’ve said something like this to yourself before, and you feel like you’re not looking at the situation objectively,” says David.
- Your excuse is surrounded by emotions of anxiety, fear, or anger. “Emotions are difficult and making excuses relieves,” says David. “It allows discomfort to be postponed. He protects you, but does not allow you to grow or move towards value. “
The reasons vary with each scenario, but the excuses can be repeated. For example, if you always give up on a commitment because you are “tired,” that’s an excuse. Excuses also make you feel better by masking your true feelings about things. Using the same example, you might want to back out of commitment because you are actually worried about social gatherings and don’t want to resist. However, until you find your own excuses, you cannot start working on things that will change you for the better. So ask yourself, “How often have I said this?”
What You Can Learn From The Excuses You Tell Yourself | Fast Company