How I Got Super Vision by Shooting My Eyeballs With a Laser

Two weeks ago I paid to get lasers in my eyes. The next day I woke up like Peter Parker after being bitten by a spider. I couldn’t climb walls, but I saw so well that I felt like a superhero. For the first time since childhood, I could open my eyes and just see . My story of laser eye surgery isn’t quite comic book worthy, but here’s all that happened in case you need those abilities too.

I had a so-so vision for most of my life. I wasn’t completely hopeless without my glasses, but contact lenses irritated my eyes, so I needed them – and I hated it. I desperately wanted to run and see where I was going. I wanted to play basketball and pass the ball to my teammates, not to a guy on the other team wearing a shirt of the same color. I wanted to wear cool sunglasses that are not expensive with a prescription. And, in a less practical but still important sense, I wanted to take comfort in the knowledge that if the world ended tomorrow, I would not rely on my glasses to survive. So, I started saving and started my journey to supervision.

Why I chose LASIK and how I found a doctor

I immediately learned that refractive surgery comes in many different forms. There’s LASIK , PRK , RLE , Epi-LASIK , PRELEX , Intacs , and more. What works for you will be different (and your doctor can help), but in my case, LASIK was the most common procedure for someone in my situation. It’s pretty safe and the least invasive. It might not be for everyone, but if you meet these criteria, it might be for you as well:

  • You are at least 18 years old.
  • Your eye prescription was (relatively) stable at least a year ago.
  • Your pupils dilate correctly.
  • Your cornea is healthy relative to the prescription, both in thickness and topography.
  • Your eye pressure is normal.
  • You can afford it. LASIK is rarely, if ever, covered by insurance.

However, you cannot check most of these things yourself, so you need to find an ophthalmologist. Fortunately, most laser eye surgery rooms will give you a free consultation. This is great for several reasons: you can find out if you are a candidate, get a feel for the doctor and his staff, learn about the procedure, and see what tools they have (I love asking how new the equipment is). These consultations are also a way to get around and visit as many doctors as possible before you make your choice. However, don’t rely only on free advice. Talk to your trusted optometrist first and ask if you are suitable for laser eye surgery before doing bypass procedures.

Choosing a doctor is not easy when there are tons of billboards and shady spots offering “specials”. Do a little research, ask your optometrist for referrals, talk to friends who have had laser eye surgery, check reviews on services like Yelp and Google, and actually read the reviews. Don’t just look at the stars. Reviewers usually describe the process pretty well, so you’ll get a good idea of ​​what the service will be like, wait times, and overall experience. I compared reviews of several places to get advice, such as LA Sight and Lasik Eye Center , but ended up settling on Dr. Paul Lee of the California Refractive Surgery Center . Their office was top notch, they had all the latest equipment, the staff were more than welcoming, Dr. Lee was very knowledgeable and experienced, and most importantly, I felt comfortable trusting them with my eyesight.

LASIK is not cheap (usually $ 1,500 to $ 2,000 per eye), so be wary of any place that offers crazy deals or big discounts. Follow your intuition; If the place seems sketchy ( for example, this is a place with constant problems with the schedule and equipment in the hallway), do not waste your time. When it comes to laser eye surgery, you get what you pay for. This is one area in your life where I recommend using the best of the best, no matter how frugal you are.

Make sure you get your money back, too. In the place where I arrived, they offer a comprehensive eye treatment. I paid $ 4,000 for my procedure ($ 2,000, $ 2,000 pay plan for eight months at 0%), but it included medicated eye drops (like antibiotics and steroids to speed up recovery), as many visits as I wanted, 24/7 support. if I have any questions or concerns, and – here is the decisive argument – free treatment procedures for the first year, if I need them or I will be unhappy with my vision. Some places may try to increase their fees for medications, additional visits, and charge up to $ 500 for eye treatments, so be sure to shop around and make sure your money is being used.

Before surgery: tests, warnings and very bright lights

Before the operation, the doctors carefully checked my eye health with a huge number of tests (sometimes with things that touch my eyes for disgust) to make sure everything was in order before the procedure. My recipe was checked in the usual way (“number one or number two?”), My retina was examined with a light that I can only describe as “brighter than God”, I was poked into my eyes with something like a digital thermometer to check my eye pressure, and I looked into the Death Star’s turbolaser so they could map the topography and curvature of my eyes.

I asked refractive index consultant Nikki Lapitan of CCRS (full disclosure: she helped me with my eye surgery) about the reasons for these tests. She explained that they are looking for underlying conditions that could cause complications with the procedure, in addition to checking your overall eye health. They needed to make sure I didn’t have glaucoma, high eye pressure, optic nerve problems, or amblyopia (lazy eye); all this must be addressed before laser eye surgery. They also check the thickness of your cornea to make sure it’s just enough to work. Unlike other refractive surgery, LASIK improves the condition of the corneal tissue of the eye; This means that if your corneas are not thick enough, they will not be able to complete the procedure.

If you are squeamish about the things that are near or in your eyes, you will surely hate almost the entire LASIK process. It’s pretty comfortable for me (I can touch my eyeball), and there were times when I thought, “Okay, get out of my eyes, please.” If you are okay with things around your eyes – for example, if you fit contact lenses professionally – this is not a bad thing at all.

As soon as I was allowed to take off, I was shown several short videos explaining how this procedure works, one of which is shown above. Basically, they cut the flap in my cornea with a microblade or a femtosecond laser , flip the flap back, and then fire other lasers into my cornea to reshape it. In this way, the corrected and focused light could reach the retina at the back of my eye. They also gave me a rundown of what post-operative recovery would be like (more on that later). After thinking for a few moments, I set a date and mentally prepared for my upcoming supervision. A note to contact wearers: You will have to discard them and wear glasses at least a couple of weeks in advance, and if possible longer. Contacts affect the shape of your cornea, so you need to give your eyes time to return to their normal shape before anything is done.

During the procedure: more light and some valium

The day finally arrived, and I was simultaneously nervous and worried more than ever. Like a child who went to Disneyland a thousand times excited. I went to the office and signed the payment documents and confirmed that I understand that, like any medical procedure, there are risks. What are the risks? Well, according to Dr. Peter Polak , who specializes in LASIK and laser cataract surgery, there are several “worst-case complications,” but they usually occur after the procedure:

  • Infection: Surgery on my eyes is still surgery, so yes, while I am recovering, infection is possible. However, doctors take many preventive measures and prescribe antibiotic drops for you while you recover, and common sense is essential. Even a severe infection is unlikely to lead to blindness.
  • Traumatic flap loss: You have been poked in the eye for the flap to break before it can heal completely. If it is partially torn, it can be repositioned and healed. If the flap is completely torn off and lost, the eye will heal and I will have to wear contact lenses on that eye or have a PRK laser procedure to fix it. Blindness or severe vision loss is unlikely.
  • Diffuse lamellar keratitis or “Sahara sands syndrome”: This occurs when certain chemicals or detergents used to sterilize equipment get caught between your eye and the flap, causing an inflammatory reaction that causes the eyes to feel gritty. This is very rare nowadays because the cause is known and avoided, but still within the limits of probability.

However, most complications are nowhere near as serious. When I asked Lapitan about the typical complications people face, she explained that some people may experience dry eyes, nighttime vision problems (often called “halos”) and blurred vision. In fact, the most likely worst-case scenario is that I would need a two-stage LASIK procedure, which means that I would need an improvement from the first procedure to get to 20/20 or higher. Lapitan assured me that the lasers they use leave very little room for error during the procedure itself, and in their practice, as in many others, there is a backup generator in case of power surges or blackouts.

After I signed my eyes, I was given some Valium to relax. I was really excited because I never had it, but it wasn’t as fun as I hoped. To be honest, this was the most disappointing part of the whole experience. I had a few more surgeries before and hoped to feel some of the “loop” I felt with other preoperative medications in the past, but it just made me really depressed. I went to the rest / recovery room, which had a super comfy sofa, water, blankets and, if I needed it, a stuffed toy to press and calm my nerves (yes, really).

After about 10 minutes of relaxing with the plush rabbit, I was taken to the operating room. They put me on the bed, which turned under the first car and covered me with a blanket.

The doctor came in, told me about what was about to happen, and covered one eye with a bandage. He placed a metal contraption in my open eye to keep it open (like in A Clockwork Orange ), but by then the Valium had fully worked, and it didn’t bother me. In fact, the only thing that gave me discomfort throughout the entire procedure was hunger.

The doctor put several injections of local anesthetic into my eye (you are awake throughout the entire procedure) and brought the first machine very close to my eye. And by intimacy, I mean literally touching and sucking on my eyeball. However, I felt nothing and knew what was happening only thanks to the information that was given to me in advance. I was told to look at the light, and after several flashes, a blurry haze obscured my vision. I was practically blind (and still, thanks to Valium). The doctor then repeated the process for the other eye. The video above shows what the process is like, but it’s actually scarier to watch than being a part, I promise.

When the doctor finished closing both of my eyes, they transferred me to the next laser. I lay back on the comfortable bed and covered one eye, as in the first car. More braces were inserted into my eye, and the doctor pushed the flap in my eye with tweezers. This was by far the strangest part of the process. In an instant, my eye went from blurry blindness to sight. It’s like someone pulled me out of a transparent hard-boiled egg.

Then the second car came closer and personally. I quickly looked at the laser light show and did the same with the other eye. The doctor sprinkled antiseptic in my eyes and was taken back to the rest / recovery room. I lay there for about half an hour, then I drove home by car (I don’t go home). I was in the doctor’s office for a maximum of an hour, and the procedure itself took almost 10 minutes.

Post-Surgery: (Short) The Path to Recovery

When I left the doctor’s office, I already saw. That was awesome. However, my eyes were very sensitive to light, so being outside was like being in the sun . Sunglasses were given to help, but they could not stop the overwhelming light around me. It sucks. My friend and I took a taco, I took another Valium from the small sampler I was given and went home to bed (which the doctors recommend).

I woke up about four hours later (tacos are a bad choice) and … I saw! I saw a clock on the other side of the room, I could read books on my bookshelf, and it was amazing. My eyes, however, didn’t look amazing. The local anesthetic was long gone, and it seemed to me that the sandman had gone too far with it and poured his entire bag of magic sand into my eyes. I used the painkillers they gave me, took Tylenol PM and fell asleep again.

As I explained earlier, the next morning was basically that scene from Spider-Man where Peter Parker grabs his glasses, puts them on and realizes that he doesn’t need them due to the radioactive spider venom. I saw perfectly with 20/20 vision (and it keeps getting better). They gave me antibiotic and steroid eye drops, which I used three times a day for a little over a week. I also had to go to a few follow-up appointments to make sure I was okay (one the next day, another a week later), but otherwise everything! I see. I’m still a little light sensitive. Not “sun” sensitivity, but rather “I’m a recovering vampire” sensitivity, and it gets better.

However, the worst part of the whole experience was an eye mask, which you have to wear for a week while you sleep. It’s not convenient at all. But you must wear it to avoid accidentally rubbing your eyes while sleeping (you cannot rub your eyes at all while you are healing). For me, this was the only thing I really disliked about laser eye surgery.

Looking Ahead: Long-Term Effects

For most people (including me), laser vision correction works great. The day after the procedure, I had 20/20 vision, and Lapitan explained that most people have at least 20/20 vision or better. Lapitan herself sees 20/15 after LASIK and I can already say that my vision is improving every day. But don’t take my word for it; As of 2008, about 95% of those who underwent the LASIK procedure were satisfied with the results .

If you’re wondering how long this supervision lasts, the short answer is “it depends.” Some people undergo LASIK and never need vision correction again, while others regress after about 10 years and either repeat the procedure or go back to glasses and contact lenses. There is no guarantee that your vision will be permanent and you can only do LASIK as many times in your life (you only have a certain amount of corneal tissue). You have to decide if it’s worth knowing that it can take so long. Personally, 10 years of perfect vision is better than life without it. In general, I am very pleased with my new superpowers.

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