Stop Feeling Overly Guilty by Presenting Rational Punishment
Guilt can paralyze us if we don’t know how to let go. A minor crime can haunt someone who feels guilty about themselves for several days. If you want to overcome this, ask yourself how a sane person will punish what you have done.
In many cases, we punish ourselves for much longer than any sane person. You forget to take milk and suddenly become public enemy # 1 in your own mind. Fortunately, the police don’t have the time or resources to track you down because you were a little forgetful this time. If they don’t bother to prosecute you for a minor violation, you don’t need to either. As the blog Barking Up the Wrong Tree explains:
When we are rational about breaking the rules, we set a limit. You won’t get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you condemn yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor misdeeds … But with guilt, we are often irrational. How can we know if we are rational? Pay attention to the intensity, duration, and consequences of the negative emotions you are experiencing. Are they appropriate? Probably no.
Sometimes guilt is a good motivator to let us know we did something wrong. If you forget the anniversary, of course, perhaps spend the day coming up with one. However, if you have done something so small that the person you fear of offending is already done with it, try not to scold yourself as hard as you can.
How To Stop Feeling Guilty, 5 Research Backed Secrets | Bark on the wrong tree