Learn How to Make Small Talk in This Video.
Small talk is disgusting for most people. However, chances are, most of the non-family relationships you’ve built began with small talk. This is a key way to get to know others. This video will show you the basics if you are uncomfortable with it.
As this video from The Art of Manliness explains, many people are uncomfortable with small talk because it is not very meaningful conversation. However, this is the method we use to get to a more “real” conversation. You are also not the only one who hates it. Everyone hates small talk, and everyone is as embarrassed as you are. However, by playing as a presenter and using the ARE method, you can smooth out the transition from stranger to friend. The ARE method works like this:
- Anchor: The first step in small talk is called an anchor. It is simply establishing what you have in common with the people around you. You are sharing some experience with the person you want to talk to, so use that as a springboard.
- Disclosure: During the disclosure stage, you add a little about yourself. Don’t get personal, but tell the other person something about yourself that he can find a common language with. The conversation is mutual.
- Encourage: Once you’ve told someone a little about yourself, also encourage them to open up. This is usually accomplished by asking questions. As the conversation continues, ask more questions and talk less about yourself to keep the other person open.
You can adapt these rules as your conversations dictate, but it is important that you allow them to happen. Small talk is not the enemy of real talk. They are the means by which you get there. In the video above, there are some more tips and examples to help you learn how to use this method to effectively make new connections.
Small Talk With Strangers | Youtube